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Review by Susan Granger
2 stars out of 4
Don't be surprised if you find yourself wishing the "gorgeous"
girls would just drop dead in this heavy-handed mock-documentary. Set
in Mount Rose, Minnesota, it purports to examine a small-town beauty
pageant. Here in the hallowed American heartland, amidst cow pats and
pork sausage, there's an all-out battle being waged for the sparkling
tiara. Denise Richards plays a spoiled little rich girl whose primary
talent seems to be sucking up to the judges, mouthing banal
platitudes, and dedicating her rendition of "Can't Take My Eyes Off
You" to Jesus Christ. Kirstie Alley plays her scheming mother, a
former winner, who also serves as the pageant's coordinator. The only
real competition comes from a sweet, guileless, tap-dancing trailer
park girl, Kirsten Dunst, who worships Diane Sawyer and wants to
become a television journalist. She's egged on by her chain-smoking,
beer-swilling mom, Ellen Barkin, and wonderfully slutty neighbor,
Alison Janney. Screenwriter Lona Williams and director Michael Patrick
Jann (MTV's "The State") rely on caricatures and revisit too many
snide, crude cliches - from the "You betcha" drawl of "Fargo" to the
"Spinal Tap" hysteria to the condescending "Waiting for Guffman"
buffoonery of "God-fearin' folk." Not that beauty pageants aren't ripe
for satire, but "Smile" (1975) did it so much better - and it didn't
need to travel to the Eating Disorder wing of the local
hospital. Holly Hunter's "The Positively True Adventures of the
Alleged Texas Cheerleader-Murdering Mom" set a standard for such
things that this doesn't even come close to. On the Granger Movie
Gauge of 1 to 10, "Drop Dead Gorgeous" is a tepid, trivial 5. Too bad
Hollywood couldn't have left it alone to develop on its own as a
little independent film called "Dairy Queens."
Copyright © 2000 Susan Granger
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out of 4
